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Foreplay is Your Ticket to Heaven
When asked "How can your spouse help you get in the mood" in a BabyCenter.com survey, 60% of moms said foreplay (hugging, stroking, kissing), and another 23% said massage, another form of foreplay.
If 83% of new moms say foreplay is what gets them in the mood for making love, what do you think might work for you?
For the record, when men were asked the same question, 98.5% said that what helps them get in the mood is any indication that she might be in the mood. 1.5% said "cook my favorite meal."
While men are raring to go at the drop of a skirt, women stay in neutral for a while. Extensive, sensitive foreplay demonstrates our love and enables new moms to shed lingering tensions and insecurities about their bodies.
This allows them to focus on the passion, which is when our sex kittens come out to play. Only after they have become aroused and are enjoying the feeling do they shift gears and catch up with our craving for action under the covers.
Basic principles regarding foreplay:
Broaden Your Definition of Foreplay
On the day of the event, foreplay could include letting her sleep in, go out by herself, get a nap in the afternoon (highly recommended for sex that night). It could also include buying or making her something, or frankly anything that makes her happy.
Try a little wine and conversation in front of a fire once the baby is asleep. Talk about your lives before junior arrived. Remind her of the fun and good times you had together; talk about your dreams for the future.
Don't Ask, Just Rub
New moms may be skittish about sex, and instinctively reject any indication or suggestion they might have such feelings. Asking is like throwing rocks in a pond just before you want to go fishing. You have to move slowly and get them interested. Try the progressive massage that starts with her feet.
Quadruple the Warm-Up Period
A general rule of thumb. Go with what her body responds to, not your well-defined but ill-fated plan to do what you like and assume she will respond. The longer you take in caressing and kissing, the more she will warm up. And the hotter she gets, the more she will enjoy it.
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