Becoming a Dad Article

What We Have Here is a Failure to Communicate

Communication, understanding and teamwork are the keys to success. If you do not regularly talk things over with your mate, it is essential that you start now.

Don't assume that you have to agree on a parental philosophy and strategy for your child's upbringing right out of the box. Common issues that will get you off to a good start can include:

  • Your dreams and concerns regarding your new family
  • How you can help each other do your best
  • How you will balance work and family

Focus on learning to talk about the issues first, learn to understand each other's perspective, and then learn to compromise, negotiate, and agree to disagree. At that point, you'll be ready to take on naming your baby.

The very common alternative is you and mom tiptoeing through a minefield in sullen silence, and periodically blowing your tops. At a time when communication becomes more important than ever, it often starts breaking down.

If this starts happening in your relationship, recognize it for what it is. And deal with it. Remember, mom is likely so focused on the baby she is oblivious to relationship issues. All she is thinking is that when she needs you most, you are not there.

Be proactive, be creative, write her a letter if words don't work. Buy her flowers when she least expects it. Take the initiative; you will be glad you did. She will too.

Both mother and father take a back seat to the baby. Communicate and work together as a team.
- Veteran Dad


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